LETTERS FROM LONDON
REASONS TO BE CHEERFUL
4 May 2019
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Huh?

Former Irish PM, Bertie Ahern, has noticed that Moggy is Ireland-ignorant.
Wait. Didn’t he recently hide, oh right, moved his cash there as his preferred tax
haven after Brexit? Bertie said Moggy doesn’t understand the Irish border. He
was speaking at a Women in Media conference where he told them that Rees-
Mogg is a “
strange fish” and “lovely fella when he’s asleep”. Presumably in his
suit of course. Best not to even imagine him sans suit. Ew.


Ahern called attention to Moggy’s apparent lack of understanding of Ireland and
Brexit, saying: “Rees-Mogg, who is chair of the European Research Group, has
previously commented that: ‘If we leave without a deal, the main culprit will be the
obdurate Irish Government’s threats about the
phantom Border issue.’” Oh
Mogs. Suggestion: best not to visit Ireland any time soon – or ever if you can
find it on a map.


Speechless

All right, each session of Parliament kicks off with a speech from the Queen,
written by the government to set the legislative agenda for the next year. Another
Bill Murray ‘groundhog day’ then? Problem? Or there are too many to list, but
particularly this one. Downing Street has confirmed the Queen’s Speech will be
delayed until Brexit has been delivered. Nooo. Really?


Historically, there have been only five years since 1900 without a speech by the
ruling monarch: 2018, 2011, 1949, 1925 and 1915. And the last Queen’s
Speech: June 2017.


The Metro said: “Theresa is trying to avoid an attempt by Brexiteer Tories to vote
down the speech and bury the withdrawal agreement. If they were to succeed, it
would likely accelerate the prime minister’s departure [while] a new session may
also need a new negotiation for the Democratic Unionist Party to continue
holding the Tories in power.”


And important legislation delayed? Clearly they haven’t noticed. Newsnight’s
Nick Watt reported: “Theresa May has no plans to preside over another
substantive Queen’s Speech. In a sign of how the prime minister believes her
days in No. 10 are numbered, Mrs. May believes the next major Queen’s
Speech should be left to her successor.”
Now you know. No breath-holding
necessary.


And what is going on at Buckingham Palace? It has issued a request. No. Not of
the Queen, but for a full-time sous chef. 33 days holiday, live-in, and requires
strong leadership.” Whatever that might mean. No occasionally convenient
vegan; MM in the kitchen to improve the dishes? Best bit? “Fluency in ‘classical
French cuisine’”. After Brexit?


Step Forward

Not ‘what a shame’, more appropriately SHAME! SHAME! SHAME! should do it.
Idiots’ favourite idiot, Jezza not equivocating, fudging, avoiding, dodging -
hiding
this time
. Hiding from his response – then and now - that book we all know about
now. Imperialism: A Study, written by John Atkinson Hobson in 1902.


Briefly, Hobson blamed the Boer War on a group of "international financiers,
chiefly German in origin and Jewish in race. The stock exchange is needless to
say, mostly Jewish." Clearly espouses Jewish financier stereotypes.


“They are harpies who suck their gains from every new forced expenditure and
every sudden disturbance of public credit”.


The Times reported,
Sir Daniel Finkelstein noted and revealed, JC’s forward to
the reprint of the book in 2011. As well as praising the "great tome", JC spoke of
the
author's "correct and prescient" passages…railing against the commercial
interests that fuel the role of the popular press with tales of imperial might… a
brilliant analysis of Western imperialism at the turn of the 20th century…it was
very controversial at the time". Absolved? Apparently not.


Evidently Jezza “noticed racist language in a seminal anti-imperialist text but it
was “reasonable” not to mention it.”


But what everyone else has said? Journalist and columnist Jonathan Freedland
responded: “If that’s true, why didn’t he reject them in the foreword where he so
warmly praised the book?
He could have said ‘the author was a man of his time,
expressing prejudices that we now know are wrong.’ But he didn’t say anything
like that.” Ouch.


Euan Philipps of the Labour Against Antisemitism group described JC’s
response as “damning". “A man with his apparent views on Jewish people
shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near Downing Street, yet this week across the
country Labour supporters will be urging British voters to endorse his party – a
move that will only tighten his grip on power.” Oh dear me.


And what did the Shadow Business Secretary Rebecca Long-Bailey say?
“Jezza, anti-semitic? Now who told you that? Utter tosh. Why Jezza even has a
bank account and how could he if he held those views? The Rothschilds? Oh he
just loves them. They made such an invaluable contribution to European
capitalism. A big working family unit. Jezza anti-capitalist? Never. He doesn’t
give all his money and worldly goods to charity. He’s surely saving it for another
monument to Karl. You know. Marx. Everybody adores Jezza for his integrity. I
know I do.”


OK. This is what she really said: “Jeremy completely rejects the anti-semitic
elements of his analysis.” Hmmm. Really. “
I haven't read the foreword myself, or
indeed the book.” What? What? She didn’t even bother to read his forward?
Over to you Jezza. Oh. Nothing to say then? Again?


Clean Sweep

How can we ignore the impending birth? Not a chance. Well we know the baby
will be raised as an American. Obviously. MM is said to want to go back to her
“Californian roots”. Moving back? A source told The Sun that MM “definitely
wants a place in Los Angeles — she loves the city, the lifestyle and climate. She
is a
California girl and can breathe easier there. She is a duchess in the UK, but
could be a
queen in LA.” Ah. To hold a royal court. Ahh. Living the American
dream. Oprah must be thrilled. Ahhh. OK. Hysterically ecstatic. But - where will
she send that unlimited life-time supply of books she has promised for the baby?
We don’t have books or any writing tradition in the UK.


Back to £3m refurbished Frogmore. MM is going to bring LA to ‘the cottage’ by
enforcing like LA-inspired like “
clean living” like ya know. She “hopes” to make
her own baby food. Yawn. “Clean-living lifestyle” includes using vegan paint
infused with eucalyptus and rosemary oils. No really. It enhances memory and
boosts the immune system if you didn’t know. A bit intense for a tiny new-born.
Eucalyptus? Huh? Really?


The baby suite, I mean nursery will be decorated "
gender-free" at Frogmore  –
we haven’t been informed about their African abode, but you can guess. But
then, why would you want to? MM is said to have decided on a monochrome
palette of whites and greys for the nursery. Greys? Really? So Feng shui, MM.
So not.


Once the endless PR-manipulated birth takes place, we will never be PR-free.
Groan.
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