|LETTERS FROM LONDON
|REASONS TO BE CHEERFUL
24 November 2018
The clueless failed to deliver the coup as we all know. But the £2bn bribed DUP
isn’t playing the game. Quelle surprise. Well, it was “Surprise! Surprise! Not
playing the game! Ha!” Theresa’s crucial Parliamentary alliance with the DUP
has suffered its first and clearly not its last serious setback after the party voted
with Labour on a key Commons vote on the Budget. Beware of Greeks bearing
gifts….’ Oh oops. Wrong quote. Let’s try ‘beware of the DUP accepting gifts’.
After accepting that £2 billion, the DUP voted with Labour in an amendment to
the Finance Bill. Did you get the connection? Money? The £2bn bribe and
finance? And the irony?
The DUP supported the amendment - known as New Clause 2 – which called on
the Treasury to produce the impact assessments of the budget on inequality and
child poverty which the government is refusing to acknowledge.
The DUP is not happy, Theresa. Not happy about her Brexit deal. They have
warned that the government faces “a rude awakening” – blimey! – over its EU
draft withdrawal bill. Not daft is it? I know….
And where was Jezza exactly? We have known for – hmm - 40 plus years how
passionately he feels about inequality with the one amendment about child
poverty - tabled by Jeremy himself. Oh dear. His office has refused to say
where he was exactly. Anorak shopping? Not good, JC.
Finally, 11 Tories forced government concessions by supporting Anna Soubry
and Chuka Umunna’s cross-party amendment to the Finance Bill, thus
compelling the government to compare the cost of Theresa’s Brexit deal against
staying in the EU.
No EU! - and their ludicrous stifling laws! Right? Right. So what about the bees
then? Bees you ask? – or really should. We already know if the bees go, we go
- as in dead. We know they are dying from US produced pesticides, but
evidently the nerve agent chemical, neonicotinoid, is causing the worker bees to
neglect their larvae by becoming lethargic. Blimey! Help! Not bee lethargy! Note
here: in their obvious wisdom and forward-thinking, Europe bans the pesticides.
And you just know where this is going if Brexit actually happens. “Welcome all
evil life-destroying chemical companies. Welcome to Little Britain. We’ve been
waiting for you.”
And the bees? The bees pollinate 71 of the 100 crops that provide 90 percent of
the world’s food. Serious enough? They pollinate everything obviously.
Strawberries, broccoli, almonds, coffee, milk, chocolate, apples, ice cream – oh
not ice cream! - the alfalfa used to feed dairy cows, ad inf. Sans bees we have
no food. Serious enough now!?
As of a year ago, nearly 30 per cent of American honey bees died in the winter,
and with more than a quarter of the 46 bumblebee species in North America are
considered at risk. Another study found that up to 40% of pollinators, including
bees and butterflies, are in decline worldwide. Scientists say these chemicals
And the controlling chemical companies? Monsanto, Dow Chemical, Bayer and
Syngenta? Naturally they are fighting to prevent any bans. Syngenta actually
requested federal regulators for permission to use even larger quantities of these
pesticides — as much as 400 times more than currently allowed. Neonics are at
least 5,000-10,000 times more toxic to bees than DDT. Be afraid, bee very
More Jeremy? Yawn. 30 Labour members have written to JC reminding him he
is meant to represent the party. It’s not his personal fiefdom - seemingly.
Someone should enlighten him before all is lost.
The letter warns that in his recent interviews his “answers were not aligned with
party policy” calling on him to reflect the “commitment to party democracy”
shown by pro-EU party activists who have themselves compromised on Brexit.
Listening, Jezza? Oh you know he isn’t – and doesn’t – never has.
The 30 conference delegates say JC has repeatedly expressed views that run
contrary to the Labour positions. Including Labour’s pledge to “support all
options remaining on the table, including campaigning for a public vote” should
the party not be able to secure a general election. They were “dismayed” that
JC told Der Spiegel “we can’t stop Brexit” and didn’t want another referendum.
Well, it is the Jeremy Corbyn party innit?
“You promised that the Labour Party leadership would comply with the policy
agreed by our members at conference.” He should “champion the commitments
made at party conference.” End of. Oh Jezza… Jezza… where are youuu???
No Way Out
“No worries. We will do most of our trading with China, after Belize of course.”
Really? Oh those keen Brexiteers. Not quite.
If the Tories didn’t know about Northern Ireland or Dover, surely they have no
idea in regards to China's controversial social credit system, do you? Let me
help. Of course they don’t.
The plan is to rank all its 1.4 billion citizens on their behaviour in real-time – is
real, and it's on track to launch by 2020. The system is hierarchical. If you are
very, very good – you will be rated 'top citizen' which gives you incentives such
as VIP treatment at airports, discounted loans, waived deposits on hotel and car
rentals and fast-tracking to elite universities. Hint: completing community service
and buying Chinese products is thought to improve your social standing. Do
they sell any other products?
Smoking in non-smoking areas is one way to reduce your high score of 800.
Not kidding. Buying items in supermarkets that the government doesn't approve
of such as alcohol or video games reduce it even further and let’s not ignore
fraud and tax-evasion and walking against the traffic light. Oh and if your best
friend or your dad says something negative about the government, you will lose
even more points. Your “untrustworthiness” transgressions will be public on a
daily basis. Goodness me. Not so good.
The repercussion? Once you have a low social score, you are barred from the
best jobs, cut off from high-speed internet – oh no! not that! and even blocked
from sending their children to top schools where all the 800s send theirs. You
could even be labelled an ‘undesirable’ and you know that’s the end for you.
It has been rolled out in some areas with results being 11.14 million have been
blocked from booking flights and 4.25 million high-speed trains. Trains – really?
No way out then.
No subtlety has been used in informing that foreign companies will be judged
and pressured to conform according to the Chinese ‘ideal’. Brexiteers, pay
attention now. Sanctions for companies so far have come in the form of fines,
rather than imprisonment . Assuming here.
One example is of the Japanese retailer Muji, which was fined 200,000 yuan in
May for labelling on products sold in China that listed Taiwan as a country.
Apparently this listing can trigger further fines from other state agencies.
The ‘social credit system’ has already completed successful trials of China’s 1.4
billion citizens via AI. Oh don’t bother to tell the blind-to-reality- Brexiteers. Really
Oh M&S. Tut tut. Oh really. Yes, surely every woman knows it’s M&S for
knickers. OK so far, right? Not right is creating Christmas windows for men only.
One window displays ridiculously good-looking David Gandy – in a suit, and in
the other window, models in bras and small pants. Now. Time for a little think
here. Sexy underwear is for men. End of. If they, men that is, didn’t exist, just
imagining, would women pay exorbitant prices for lacy sexy underwear they
prance around in? Think thongs. Argh! Let’s not. Admit it.
Reminder: this week marked the centenary of the Parliament (Qualification of
Women) Act, which allowed women in the UK to become MPs for the first time
ever. And in the century that followed? Come on now. Give it a guess. Fewer
than 500 women have gained seats in Westminster … compared to more than
4,500 men. Lovely. So encouraging. And all that money spent on sexy
underwear – evidently futile.
Now how could it not be noted here that more than 8,200 women in England and
Wales have died unnecessarily. Evidently they could have – could have!
survived their heart attacks had they simply been given the same – the same –
quality of treatment as men! Leeds University researchers say the number is
likely to be much higher! Now why would that be? Really.