|LETTERS FROM LONDON
|REASONS TO BE CHEERFUL
27 April 2019
|Are We Having Fun Yet?
Oh we so are now. The odious Ann Widdecombe will stand against Boris' sister
Rachel (who has jumped over to Change UK) and even more fun, Moggy’s sister
Annunziata Rees-Mogg, also in the Nige party, in the European elections in May.
Best to keep in mind AW being dragged across the Strictly dance floor in 2010
that was shown on a continuous loop. All right. Not quite but nearly. AW has
pledged to “campaign vigorously” – rather like a rabid hyena then - for the Brexit
Party now that she has defected from 55 years spouting Conservative party
propaganda and lies.
Miss Widdecombe is “on a mission”. How appropriate for a rude religious right-
wing fool who demands attention at all times the moment she opens her mouth to
interrupt, shrilly/aggressively/antagonistically/over-talk anyone who disagrees.
And seriously, who doesn’t. OK. Possibly her mother (with whom she lived with
forever until she ‘retired’) must be so proud.
And what else did AW say? What didn’t she? “Nigel Farage has been more
successful than any politician other than Margaret Thatcher in my lifetime in
getting his agenda through, and he's done this from outside Westminster”.
And what did Annunziata say? “Our fight is just as important as the suffragettes.”
Assuming she will volunteer to move into a damp, rat-infested jail cell and beg for
forced feeding via a tube forcefully jammed down her throat. Gobsmacked
appropriately. Brexit Party on…
The Emperor’s New Clothes
Opening window, screaming now. WTF!!! Repeat. WTF!!! I am confused. I didn’t
realise Jezza had been made god, king, emperor – oh right, emperor – perfect:
emperor’s new clothes. More apt when he had his very first suit bought for him a
few years back out of obvious necessity.
Back to the point. Labour’s draft Euro elections leaflet, leaked to HuffPost UK, a
FreePost mailshot for every household with no mention of the party’s latest
policy position – you know that one - pushing for a second referendum on any
Brexit deal. OK. Bad enough, but the leaflet declares Labour would press ahead
with Brexit!!! With Jezza’s version naturally.
Keir Starmer is ‘absolutely furious’ and says it “will have to change” before it is
sent to the printers. Neither Starmer, nor Tom Watson, nor Emily Thornberry
were consulted. Note here: they form part of the party’s Brexit sub-committee
Worst, if there is a ‘worst’, is that the MEPs were not consulted either - and the
leaflet was being sent out in their name. Extraordinarily, the leader of the
European Labour Party, MEP Richard Corbett, was not consulted. One senior
Labour source said: “This is clearly a monumental and embarrassing f***-up…
MPs, activists and the MEP candidates themselves will just go rogue. We’ll have
Hmm. Images of JC tied to a stake on his allotment – his main obsession - with
Labour Remainers dancing round him taunting him: “Remain! Remain! Remain!
But not you, Jezza”. If only. And the European elections? Despair doesn’t even
cover it. What a total mess. With Party Nige ahead in the polls, solutions to
prevent Nige from ruling the world? Hmm.
An Act of War
The UN has backed a resolution on combating rape in conflict. But, and naturally
a very big but, from that ever so enlightened racist country naturally vehemently
opposed any references in the text to sexual and reproductive health. Clue: the
US. The vote was carried 13 votes in favour. China and Russia abstained.
In recent months, The Don’s administration has refused to agree to any UN
documents that refer to sexual/reproductive health that imply support for
abortions. Repeatedly gang raped 10 year-olds, naturally not a problem, eh
Donny? More: it has also opposed the use of the word “gender”. Certainly you
knew that it is a cover for possible liberal promotion of trans-gender rights.
Really!? Trans-genders should have rights? Really?
And the UN reaction to the US regressive ignorant stubborn stance? “Now it’s an
unholy alliance of the US, the Russians, the Holy See, the Saudis and the
Bahrainis, chipping away at the progress that has been made.” Oh that
vehemently misogynist band of brothers.
Out of Africa
Piers Morgan – I know, I know – has asked the obvious: “So it’s been revealed
that Harry and Meghan are planning to move to the much larger global stage of
the gigantic African continent after their baby arrives, to rub off a bit of their
regal stardust magic there. Lucky Africans! Poor Brits!"
Well yes, very poor Brits actually, because we’ll be the ones who pay for their
move for however long this African jolly, or should I say folly, lasts…24/7
security, and Meghan’s large retinue of personal staff, the cost could run into
millions. Not that ‘Queen’ Meghan will care.
Since marrying into the British Royal Family, she’s already shown a gleeful
propensity for spending money in a manner so extravagant she’s been dubbed
‘Meghan Antoinette’ in honour of the infamously over-the-top 18th Century
French Queen.” (He doesn’t stop to take a breath).
“There was her wedding to Harry a year ago, estimated to have cost $40 million
including a $500,000 Clare Waight Keller wedding dress, that was mostly
financed by British taxpayers.
…trying to create their own new rival version of the Monarchy, on an alternative
continent, to preen. High-society magazine Tatler recently reported in a long
editorial that long-suffering Kensington Palace staff have a new nickname for
Meghan: ‘Me-Gain’. Sadly, it’s hard to argue with it. Meghan Markle’s hit the
jackpot, but at what cost to the rest of us?”
Goodness me. Well, now we know what Piers thinks. No surprise though.
We have seen endless hugging photos. H&MM, or is it M-G now, wrapping their
arms tightly around all available little children on their African publicity tours.
Ahh. No. Not. Clue: PR. Frogmore is just not far enough away from the
estranged Wills and Ex-W. And dear me, surely much better to have their very
own publicity machine operating sans interference by that tiresome future king -
and all those children.
The Sunday Times’ Tim Shipman was the first to reveal that courtiers have
drawn up plans to see H&M-G move ‘abroad’ for two or three years. And the
most recent proof needed regarding the ‘drift’, OK chasm between the royal
couples was displayed at Easter at St George’s Chapel at Windsor when Wills
and Harry walked to the church separately and stood apart – a statement meant
to send a message to their separate devotee camps.
American Whole Foods have made a celebratory cheese: ‘Royal Addition.’ A
red cheddar cheese. Did they mean a ginger cheese perhaps? Whole Foods
describes the cheese “as tangy and creamy, with a slightly sweet and nutty
finish”. Right. A ‘nutty’ finish. Perfect for a baby.
A Whole Foods press release clarified. “Cheddar is one of the most popular
cheeses in both the UK and the US and this rustic English cheese embodies the
cultures of both the Duke and Duchess–just like the royal baby!” Sweet. Not.
Plastic possibly. American cheese. Not $$$ inspired surely.
MM (aka M-G) told a lifestyle site in 2017 “What I do really happen to lovvvvve is
that boxed macaroni and cheese.” “Happen” to love? Say cheeeeese! Better to